Psychology dating separated men

Separating from your wife means you move away from the marriage, but have not yet made the decision to leave. Whether we are talking about an emotional or physical separation, distance is the thing being used to resolve a marital problem. If marriage has gotten stressful or painful for some reason, a separation is one way to avoid any further destructive consequences.

The philosophy goes something like this, if I get away from you I will avoid hurting you further or being hurt by you further or both.

This would mean your separated lover intends to remain in a perpetual separation.

If you want a full-time emotionally available man, he’s not the one. In the long-run it’ll be much less painful and far more fruitful.

"[But] a divorce for someone who was married a long time or has kids may mean having to integrate all of those factors into the relationship." Regardless of the circumstances of his previous marriage, going through a divorce can also impact how a guy sees or acts in a romantic relationship, says Manhattan-based licensed clinical psychologist Joseph Cilona, Psy. That's why you should ask him these key things before you get serious: A man who completely avoids the topic or shows “significant discomfort” talking about his divorce may still be emotionally invested or, at the very least, has some serious tension about the topic, Cilona says. It shows that he has an unhealthy connection to his previous marriage and/or spouse, which could be trouble for your future.

You might assume that since he's been married before, he wouldn’t have any issues hitching up again, but as Durvasula points out, that’s not always the case.

And, while experts say the divorce rate is now lower than 50 percent, the odds are still pretty decent that you’re going to date a divorced dude at some point.

While there's nothing wrong with dating a guy who's been previously hitched, there are some potential issues that can crop up.

Now, it is entirely possible for a man to be emotionally but not physically separated from his wife. They leave their spouse emotionally but live separately together in the same space with no physical separation between them.

The big problem here of course is not having your own space.

So they put their marriage in a state of suspended animation while they ‘grow up.’ Because the love they have for each other is strong, it lasts and waits for that future time when they come back together changed by time and maturation.

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